Times of Uncle Ernest - Chesapeake City and Beyond – Ellie, Chapter 9

Times of Uncle Ernest -

Chesapeake City and Beyond – Ellie, Chapter 9

       "OK, Unk, what happened next, after that mushy stuff?"

       "Now, Moose, take it easy. I must say, though, that things went sour for us in a hurry. One early morning we approached an island surrounded by rocks. When we got closer we were shocked to see three ravishing young women lounging on the rocks. And, Moose, they didn't have a stitch on. And they were singing the most tantalizing songs. You know, an old man had warned me about these deadly maidens on the rocks. They were called the Syreens, and any sailors who heard their singing would be inevitably drawn to them, thereby smashing their ships against the jagged rocks. I love music, Moose, and I was determined to hear their songs. So this is what I did.

       "I went below and put plugs into Mendy's ears so he couldn't hear their songs. Then I got Ellie to tie me to a beam on the sub's deck. Because she was a girl she would be unaffected by the Syreens' singing. I told her that if I asked to be untied she should wind more ropes around me. She understood, so then I yelled to Mendy to steer right up close to the Syreens. Well, He did just that, taking us within twenty feet of them.

       "Moose, so help me, when I heard their songs I started tearing and biting at the ropes so I could get to those girls. 'Ernie, honey! Why them? You have me!' Ellie cried, throwing her arms around me. But I hated her at that moment, so I shoved her away and tore at the ropes furiously. Ellie screamed at Mendy to speed up but, of course, he couldn't hear her. Then she wound the spare ropes around and around me, securing me fast. Eventually we sailed out of range and she cut me loose. Moose, I fell to the deck in a heap. I was so exhausted. But I was happy. I was the only man in the world to have heard the Syreens' songs and lived to tell about it.

       "Ellie was mad at me for the way I treated her. I couldn't explain my feelings, but after a while she relented, and we had great fun making up. We continued on our way for many days until we came upon a large island. When we got closer we saw multi-colored flowers growing everywhere. They smelled wonderful, so we anchored and went ashore so Ellie could pick some. We found out that the place was called the Land of the Lobis Eaters. It was inhabited by the most gentle, peaceful people I had ever known. They were incredibly laid back, Moose, so much so that all they did was lie around in the pastures and on the seashore all day and all night long. Geez, they were even worse than the people who live here in Chesapeake City.

       "Now, when Ellie started collecting the magnificent flowers, she discovered that the plants also produced delicious fruit, so she ate some and gave a bunch of it to Mendy and me. Mendy started pigging out on it straightaway, but I laid mine aside in favor of a fifth of Old Granddad that I had brought along. As I drank I strolled around the area, checking things out. Moose, I was disgusted to discover that we were among a community of bums. All they did was lounge around all over the place. And when I returned I was amazed to find Ellie and Mendy stretched out on the grass in a daze. Their speech was slurred, like drunks, and all they wanted to do was gaze at the sky and eat that lobis fruit. I was mad, Moose, because I wanted to get going, but what could I do? I didn't want to carry them back to the sub.

       "So, hoping that with time the drug would wear off, I took the sub out to deeper water to do some fishing. I headed north towards a point that looked promising, where birds were circling all around. But when I reached the area a swift current sucked me into a raging whirlpool. It took me under and spun me around so fast that I lost consciousness. When I awoke the sub had surfaced, and I found myself traveling up a wide, exquisite river. Then I realized what was going on: this was Didie's doings. Remember her, Moose?"

       "Sure. She put you in the sub and said you'd have exciting adventures."

       "You got it! And when I get back you'll find out where that river led."  [To be continued Tuesday, 6/26/2012]