Days of Uncle Ernest - Chesapeake City and the World – José, Chapter 9

Days of Uncle Ernest -

Chesapeake City and the World – José, Chapter 9

Regaining his cheerful disposition, Uncle Ernest continued his story. “After a few minutes I went outside to get some air and I saw Mamie, José’s Mom, coming towards me down the path. As she waved to me she almost fell from tripping over some camel dung, so when she approached I said, ‘Hail, Mamie, you’re certainly full of grace this afternoon. Lordy, but you’re lucky; you must be a blessed woman to have kept your balance like that.’ ”

“ ‘Ernie, you’re still as nuts as ever,’ she smiled, not really meaning to hurt my feelings. ‘And I’ll be sure to pray for you to change before you die.’ And do you know, Moose, I knew that she meant well, because she took my cheeks in her hands and gave them a couple of pats before she continued on down the path to order her favorite lunch, a nice pepperoni pizza, loaded with extra goat cheese.

“After a couple of weeks I got awfully bored, so I decided to head on back to Wilmington to see how the ponies were faring. I called an urgent club meeting, and the night before we met I broke the news to Maggie. Naturally, she was heart-broken and pleaded for me to take her with me. But I made it clear that partying and gambling with me in Wilmington would not be the life for her. She finally agreed and that night we had a nice intimate party. We sipped some mighty fine wine and enjoyed some mighty nice snuggling all night.

“At the next club meeting I told everybody goodbye and asked them what they planned for the future. The original charter members were all there (minus José and Jud of course), along with Mamie, Maggie, and a roomful of prospective members. We elected Pete, president; Matt, vice president; Jimmy, secretary; and Tom, treasurer.”

“Then everybody talked about their plans. Mamie said that she was going to devote her life to Josanity, in honor of her son. Maggie, with bloodshot eyes and sobs, said that she was going to fight for women’s rights and become a Josain nun in order to further the cause of Josanity.

“Pete gave a powerful speech, saying that he planned to take a course in masonry at the famous Daveston Vocational School so he could build a big church for the ever-expanding club. He said that he hoped to get big contributions from some rich members so he could construct a beauty, which he planned to call Sir Pete’s Cathedral. You know, Moose, it’s sad, because I’ll bet that, after I left, the club must have folded. I’ve never, ever, heard of Josanity or Sir Pete’s Cathedral. Have you?”

“Heck no, Unk, but I don’t know didly about fancy clubs or religions. I only go to Sunday School one Sunday a year, in July, so I can go to the church picnic at Port Herman.”

“Well, as I said, it’s a shame, because José and the others worked their butts off to get something started only to have it all go down the tubes. Anyway, after saying our goodbyes—amidst sighs, kisses, and hugs—I hopped a camel caravan back to that lake where I had first landed. I found my balloon right where I had hidden it in the cattails, inflated it, and ascended high into the heavens over that great walled city of Daveston, which got smaller and smaller until it became just a speck in the vast desert below.”

“Did it take you on home then, Unk?”

“Shoot no, Moose, it took ten more long years to get home. You won’t believe where it set me down. But you’ll have to wait a while to hear what happened. I have some important business with Dolph tonight.”

Yeah, well, that meant that he would be partying in Dolph Wharton’s Tavern all night, chewing the fat with the local yokels and doing who knows what else. He might make it back by morning, but I had my doubts.

        And so, Nina, when Uncle Ernest left I zipped around on my bike for a while, threw a bunch of stones at the clothesline pole and, retreating from the approaching darkness (and the mosquitoes it would bring), went into the house to see if Pop would read me the funnies before it was time to climb the stairs for bed.  [To be continued Friday, 11/09/2012]