Times of Uncle Ernest - Chesapeake City and Beyond – Patti, Chapter 6

Times of Uncle Ernest -

Chesapeake City and Beyond – Patti, Chapter 6

       "You'll be surprised to know, Moose, that I found Ellie and Mendy pretty quickly, thanks to a new GPS that I had discovered installed in the sub. That was Didie's doings, to be sure. When I found them they were still in a stupor, without a care in the world. So I did the only sensible thing I could do, Moose. I slung a limp Ellie over my shoulder and stuck my sword in Mendy's ribs, forcing him to walk ahead of us to the sub.

       "After a couple of days at sea they were back to normal, only now there was more bad luck for me. Instead of Ellie falling all over me, as I had expected, she was now in love with Mendy. That lobis drug had altered her mind, Moose. Nothing I did or said would bring her to her senses. I even told her that I'd take her back with me to marvelous Chesapeake City, where we could hang out in the Hole-in-the-Wall with Birdy the Bartender.

       “I enticed her with the thought of eating out at John Schaefer's superb restaurant, where his tasty devilled crab dish was the talk of the country. I tried to seduce her with the romantic notion of swimming in the C&D Canal, at the famous Burnt House Swimming Hole, where we could embrace on the grassy bank and watch the current swirl around the lighthouse.

       "But no amount of luxury, not even the charm and excitement of Chesapeake City, could convince her. The damage to her brain was complete, because she grabbed me by the shoulders, glared in my face, and yelled, 'Listen, Ernie, you goofball! My man is Mendy. Is that clear!' It was clear to me that she was deranged, but it made Mendy the happiest man in the world. So I took them back to Sparka, where soon they had a spectacular wedding. It was what Mendy had wanted all along so I was happy for them both. I was his best man, Moose and, when we said our good-byes, guess what they said they'd name their first son?"

       "I know, Unk, 'Ernie!' "

       "Sure thing, Moose—'Ernest Lunt Mendelus!' Doesn't that have a splendid ring to it? And it made me feel great as I headed back to Wilmington across the vast Atlantic.  [To be continued Tuesday, 7/17/2012]